Even before i knew what hate was, I've been hating you. So dont expect that feeling to go away just cos u tell me that u give a damn abt me. I dont care even if you dont care care. I loathe you so much i'd never want to carry your name ever again.

You say you've got a temper. Guess what? The apple doesnt fall far from the tree. All these time, you thought your actions were justified. All these time, you thought you've done the right thing. Well,you thought wrong.

You say you've been tolerating my change of behaviour recently. Know what? I've been tolerating your unchanging ways for years.

One day, this will explode in my heart. All the anger and resentment I've been feeling towards you will break loose. And one day, the sane part of me will agree with the monster inside my head and i'll do something back to you as you've done to me.

And if ever one day, you lay a hand on me, you'd find yourself without a hand.

Don't try to act as if your always right. You're never right. I'm sick of having to listen to you. Now it's my turn: I hate you and will always do.

I went to BK the other day at the one located near tampines interchange. The moment i stepped in, i wanted to slap his face. The guy at the counter didnt even bothered to fake a smile. After that, we sat down near the counter area. Then i saw the same counter crew leaning against a doorway. I was pissed at that moment. The next thing he did disgusted me. He was actually eating in front of another customer. He noticed me looking at him. Not wanting him to think that i'm interested in him, i wrote a feedback on their napkin. He's kind service is something that i would never want my crew to project to other people. It's disgusting.

On to other stuff, I failed to recieve any letters from any bloody university. I get the feeling that i'll never go anywhere. If thats the case, then i guess i'll just stick to my job then. Get money, get license, get vespa then apply private uni. It'd probably take more time intended but hell, i aint that smart and this is the route i gotta take whether i like it or not.

So till then, see ya folks.

It feels like i'm on a bike and it's going fast and out of control. The options i have are to jump or continue the ride.

If i jump, i'd seriously hurt myself. The pain would be immediate but the terror would be over.

But if i continue on, i'd be scared shit. But hopefully i won't get too hurt.

It's the same thing. I know there's something wrong with me but some people fail to see that until it's too late.

I wish i could morph myself. I want to be with Balem. I'm in love with him. But too bad we're of a different species. He loves me. He shows me unconditional love. That's hard to find.

I think it's creeping up again.