alot of things happened in one night.

i asked a random cute guy to join us for a movie. but he declined.

watched a movie with two-third of my girlfrens.

and then we met ama.

we were screaming in the car on the way to ECP. cos she was driving quite fast.my gut feeling told me to strap on my seatbelt. good thing i said it out loud.the girls behind did the same.

then i saw the give way sign.

i screamed stop.

in my head, i was thinking, why arent we slowing down?

i looked at nat, she was just looking straight ahead.

that was when i saw the truck dangerously close and she stil didnt see it.

i think it was when we hit the truck then she started to scream.

i still can see the truck swerving, the driver trying to regain control of his truck at the back of my eyes.

it was so livid but yet felt like a dream.

i was badly shaken.

i was just glad that no one was hurt. and that i was there with her to experience her first accident.

i dont blame her and i never will. i felt guilty cos i was the one who playfully screamed in the car which made everyone else scream playfully.nat got distracted by us.

so it started fromme.

i kept thinking abt what would have happened if i'd stalled them when we were still in marina.

what would have happened if i didnt put my seatbelt on.

just cant stop thinking.

damnit.

cant stop thinking. abt him. abt her.

cant drown out my thoughts either.

i hate having feelings.

mothrefuckers, pls stop asking me to go back to school. which part of, i dont have any fucking money, do u not understand?

for the rest of the mofos, stop trying to pretend as if u can be trusted. one fucked up my heart, the pther fucked up my mind. thanks for the false security. i should have never trusted anyone. this is wat i get for being too naive.

and in case u motherfucker havent noticed, i'm human. i aint a fucking atm. i dont shit money for u. not anymore, anyways.

thanks a fuckalot everyone. i'm off to find another way.

damnit. how come i'm all sappy now. cant stop thinking abt his smile. abt wat he said.

what's going on?!

argh. damnit.

his eyes, the way he looks at me. his manja voice.

ar fuck.

why is he tormenting me? why are u in my thoughts. get out!

is it too late to make a resoultion?

oh well, it's not really one.just a plan.

i want to go back tp school. just not biomedical anymore.

a diploma.

in business management. part time.

talked to mum and she was the one who suggested it. makes sense actually cos i was planning to take it after my degree. but since i aint getting one now, she figured i take my dip now.

makes sense cos i still wanna own my own cafe.

but just not now. the timing isnt right.

but when has it ever been right? sigh.

when have i ever done the right thing? i might have just lost someone dear to me just over a petty thing.

i was so fucking stupid.

nay, i'm still so fucking stupid.

when will i ever learn my lesson?

animal lovers, people with feelings, humans.whoever u are, pls watch this.

http://www.petatv.com/tvpopup/video.asp?video=fur_farm&Player=qt

if u think i'm emo, u have to watch this and decide if i'm stil emo or not.

http://hopeisemo.com/

anyways, the reason i'm writing again is cos of this email i got from a friend of mine back in jc.

this was her email:

THIS EMAIL HAS BEEN CURSED ONCE OPENED YOU MUST SEND IT.You are now cursed. You must send this on or you will be killed. Tonight at12:00am, by Mickey Mouse. This is no joke. So don't think you can quicklyget out of it and delete it now because Mickey Mouse will come to you if youdo not send this on. He will slit your throat and your wrists and pull youreyeballs out with a fork. And then hang your dead corpse in your bedroomcupboard or put you under your bed. What's your parents going to do whenthey find you dead? Won't be funny then, will it? Don't think this is a fakeand it's all put on to scare you because your wrong, so very wrong. Want tohear of some of the sad, sad people who lost their lives or have beenseriously hurt by this email?
CASE ONE -Annalise Richmond :She got this email. Rubbish she thought. She deleted it.And now, Annalise dead.
CASE TWO -LouiseWhitefield: She sent this to only 4 people and when she woke up in themorning her wrists had deep lacerations on each. Luckily there was no painfelt, though she is scarred for life.
CASE THREE -Thomas Crowley: He sent this to 5 people. Big mistake. The night Thomas waslying in his bed watching T.V. The clock shows '12:01am'. The T.V misteriously flickered off and Thomas's bedroom lamp flashed on and offseveral times. It went pitch black, Thomas looked to the left of him andthere he was, Mickey Mouse standing in white rags. Blood everywhere with aknife in his hand then disappeared. The biggest fright of Thomas's life.

Warning... NEVER look in a mirror and repeat -'Mickey Mouse.Mickey Mouse.'Mickey Mouse... I KILLED YOUR SON' Is it the end for you tonight!
YOU ARE NOW CURSED We strongly advise you to send this email on. It is seriously NOJOKE. We don't want to see another life wasted. ITS YOUR CHOICE... WANNA DIETONIGHT? If you send this email to...NO PEOPLE - Your going to die.1-5 PEOPLE - Your going to either get hurt or get the biggest fright of yourlife.5-15 PEOPLE - You will bring your family bad luck and someone close to youwill die.15 -25 OR MORE PEOPLE - You are safe from Mickey Mouse

** DO NOT FORWARD COPY AND PASTE. RENAME THE SUBJECT ' Mickey Mouse'

i personally find it hilarious that mickey mouse would try to kill me. i havent forwarded it to anyone and i'm still waiting for him to show up. if i see that sonabitch i'll fucking skin him alive. so we'll see who kills who first, shall we?

i almost forgot that i have a blog.

and pls people stop wishing me happy new year. why is it suppose to be happy anyways? do i look happy that the new year is here? do i look like i even care?

stop being optimistic.u will get disaappointed easily.

i'm not being pessimistic. i'm being realistic.

the first day of the new year and alrdy i had a bad day.

so stop wishing me happy new year.